Well no one told me about her
The way she lied
Well no one told me about her
How many people cried
But it's too late to say you're sorry
How would I know
Why should I care
Please don't bother tryin' to find her
She's not there
Well let me tell you 'bout the way she looked
The way she'd act and the colour of her hair
Her voice was soft and cool
Her eyes were clear and bright
But she's not there
.
Well no one told me about her
What could I do
Well no one told me about her
Though they all knew
But it's too late to say you're sorry
How would I know
Why should I care
Please don't bother tryin' to find her
She's not there

.

THE ZOMBIES or SANTANA

(ok - so she might not be there,
but how about
a little black magic instead?)
.

.
;-)

back to life, back to reality

Smallest Person had the day off school yesterday due to a teachers' training day, which I hadn't realised she was due to have when I arranged that yesterday would be the day I was going to meet my father. . .

The Teen (who was angling for the day off anyhow, as he's excited about the new house) then decided he would have to miss school to make sure I was OK about the whole "meeting my father" thing. . .

(Middle One said he'd rather go to school and not bunk off, thank you very much - clever boy)

so, rather than my father and I meeting - for only the second time since autumn of the year 2000 - alone, I had two of the three most precious people in my life with me

it was excruciatingly awful

that's all I'll say for now, (she writes, but then rabbits on a little anyhow) apart from the fact the lawyer phoned me at half ten to say the house was mine and the three of us were just about to go over and have a whoop and a holler and run about our new home and take photos of the view from the roof terrace, and my father wasn't due until "just before lunch" (which was going to be at one o'clock) when he turned up early. . .

.
really early. . .

really really early. . .

(just after the lawyer phoned)

(quite how I could have forgotten that as a child under his jurisdiction we always turned up everywhere two hours early, I do not know) (I kid you not) (not just about the "two hours early", that used to be pretty awful, but I also don't know why I'd forgotten that aspect of his character) (and we always had to leave early, as my mother used to say it was "impolite to overstay one's welcome") (FUCK IT - what's that Phillip Larkin poem about your parents?)

*deep breath*

he tried his hardest to take over proceedings, I tried my hardest to be an adult about it and not let my inner child cower before his "authority", not have my children feel he was their father and they had to cower. . .
.

he kept calling me Glenda

what took the biscuit was when the estate agent who sold me the house was handing over the keys to my new abode, and my father reached over to take them. . .

that was when I proactively drew on all my inner strength
and the learning from the past few years kicked in

. . .I have learned a lot in the past few years

anyhow

anyhow. . .

*relaxed breathing*

what else happened yesterday? someone I care about very very deeply said some very hurtful things about me. . .

*calm*

.
XCH flew back in from wherever he'd been on business and cycled over to the new abode a little later in the afternoon and got really excited about it and started suggesting masses of things I could do to it - really really good ideas! things I'd love to do! - I gave him a slightly withering look and reminded him that he was my current and only source of income and the budget I'm on might not quite stretch to the cosmetic delights he's suggesting seeing as I'm doing structural work (and have cushions to buy)

I think he has house envy actually, and wishes he had bought it instead of me. . . perhaps I should suggest we swap, and I'll live in his swanky flat with a view of the river!

The Teen, who was planning to stay with me "at home" yesterday evening, to keep me company, his idea not mine, he knew I was a little stressed out after my day, got the roundup call from his tribe and went out. . .

but, as they say, today is a new day. . .

I hope yours is a good one!

let's have a little Nina
.

and some more
of the good feelings
from MUSE

.
(cos we all know, if it's good we want more, don't we!)
.

and on that basis
check out the horns in
this. . .
.
dontcha just love the way
they slip in the
James Bond theme tune chords. . .
I do!

shopping?

when XCH left we split our accumulated possessions

he got the wedding cutlery, I got the wedding dinner service; needless to say, I don't have dinner parties anymore so the posh stuff is still boxed up in the cellar. . .

he got the decent wine glasses, I got the ordinary wine glasses; I don't drink, so the ordinary wine glasses are still boxed up in the cellar. . .

we divided the everyday plates and glasses between us; he bought some new everyday glasses and some new plates, the children and I have been using the plates and glasses I brought here and they are all becoming a little worse for wear. . . (I'm thinking of investing some of his hard earned money in some new everyday plates and glasses)

I got the wedding saucepans (which I'd never liked), he bought some new ones (of which I am very envious). . .

we were given everything on our wedding list when we married, because the list was very minimal and we didn't have many people coming to our wedding: decent dinner service, decent posh cutlery and a set of Le Creuset saucepans (oh, and a fondue pot). . .

so, if I go out and but some new stuff what ought I do with the posh dinner service (barely used, but no longer my choice of dinnerware should I ever have another party again) and the (rather battered after almost sixteen years of heavy use and now going a little rusty, but still perfectly functioning) Le Creuset saucepans?

(and should I bother taking the ordinary wine glasses with me, seeing as how I don't drink?)

TOTALLY TRAUMATISED

(three trips to the dump later)

if I had the energy I'd list what, from the little I had left anyhow of my previous life, has now been rehomed, recycled, reused and put in the refuse. . .

. . .I haven't

I love this

and this. . .
.

(on which the above is based,
but then you knew that, didn't you)

dawn to dusk with Joseph Mallord William. . .

.

. . .Turner
.

and as requested by the very talented and

equally fascinating dinahmow here is another one! what links these books:
.

Lolita Vladimir Nabakov

Anna Karenina Leo Tolstoy

So Long, See You Tomorrow William Maxwell

The Human Stain Philip Roth

Miss Lonelyhearts Nathanael West

The Magic Mountain Thomas Mann

One Hundred Years of Solitude Gabriel Garcia Marquez

Autobiography of a Face Lucy Grealy

The Giant's House Elizabeth McCracken

Random Family Adrian Nicole LeBlanc

.
.

?

do you know what links these songs. . .

San Antiono Rose Bob Wills

Louisiana Man Rusty and Doug

Chattanooga Choo Choo Glenn Miller

Can't Take My Eyes Off You Vikki Carr

Wichita Lineman Glen Campbell

The Girl From Ipanema Astrud Gilberto

Sugar, Sugar The Archies

Suspicious Minds Elvis

Little Woman Bobby Sherman

Son of a Preacher Man Dusty

it has nothing to do with me (altho I have listed them)

it has nothing to do with here (altho I have listed them here) (one of them used to be on my favourite LP from the Croydon Public Lending Library, where my life long affair with books and the persuit of genius began)(as you can tell, I didn't get very far with that, probably because I got sidetracked by music, initially Glenn Miller - that man has a lot to answer for) (A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I got a guy. . . sorry, digressing)

it has nothing to do with the old band (even tho I did a Dusty number myself and one of the band members once described me as his Girl From Ipanema) (which, because I had never placed the title and the song together, was meaningless at the time) (altho I took it as a compliment, of sorts, later)

it has nothing to do with what's on the radio. . .

right, that's enough clues

over to you guys!