;-)

altho aspects of being here are ok-ish, bearable, bring a smile to my face on occasion (the view, for example) I'm longing to be back living somewhere real

my home, possibly (by which I mean the house where the children are)

it's not as simple as putting one's hat down when one walks thru the door tho, is it, making a home out of a house. . .

. . . as well as my hat collection, every"thing" else of mine is there - some "things" still in as yet unpacked boxes, true. . .

. . .but I have no real association with the bricks and mortar and the space they contain; of course, my children exist in that space, and their presence, their beings, their being there, are the most homely associations for me

sometimes when I'm sitting with the children I think that when I am allowed back into that house I will never leave it - so, in those instances, I know it will become my home

I was born in 1964: "at home"; moved for the first time in 1969, then 1971, 1972 and 1975; lived "away from home" in 1982, 1983, 1986; made a new home for myself in 1987; bought my first property in 1990; XCH moved in with me in 1991 and we married in 1992 and then we bought a new home in 1993; we then moved in 1994, 1996, 1997 (three times), 2004; we sold-up and separated in 2007, both rented for a year, this spring I bought the house and for the last couple of months, as you know, I've found myself living in XCH's rented apartment. . .

that's a lot of sorting, packing, unpacking, painting and decorating, settling in, feeling grounded only for more upheaval all over again, isn't it? no wonder I'm so tired

there is still a lot to do at the house

a couple of weeks ago I had a new boiler fitted (the old one had broken, but nobody had noticed, as an electric immersion had been heating the water for the last three months - I'm dreading the electricity bill); the light fittings are in desperate need of an electrician to sort them out and make them work (I've tried changing the bulbs, but it makes no difference); there are patches of damp and rotting wood that need attending to; drips and leaks, when it rains, that need plugging; acres of wall need a lick of paint; shelves need to be put up, pictures hung, clutter put away, boxes unpacked. . .

I'm going to be exhausted!

but all of that will be better than living here

9 comments:

Mel said...

Oh, but it'll be a good exhaustion with an end product to step back and have a good look at.....

AND who knows--cable cords could mysteriously avail themselves to you! LOL

Yaknow, I'd be hard pressed to note what year I moved, where. Heck--I can't even remember what year I bought the little yellow house.
(and omgosh, there are still unpacked boxes from that one)
k.....I might have a bit of a issue with procrastination.

I, like the view said...

hey! what are you doing awake at this time. . .

hope you're looking after yourself. . .

perhaps procrastination on some things means that we're focussing on others - which might be good

unpacking boxes of old stuff could wait, if we're spending today doing good new stuff?

and yes, I'm really looking forward to the day when the house becomes my home

(-:

hugs dearheart, very early in the morning ones. . .

XX

Donn Coppens said...

My Mother redecorated the house every couple of years (seriously)so I think it's quite normal to re-do everything.

If I don't at-the-very-least move something once a week I feel trapped.
:)

Rimshot said...

Hi. *waves*

Mel said...

Yup......up early, down late.

Do ya get the sense that I MIGHT be thinking too much?

<--definitely gets that sense...

I hope you slept well.

Mel said...

Greetings on Hump Day!!

:-)

Dave said...

I've been waiting for you to popst something today, so that I can say good morning. As I'm about to shut down for a while, though, I shall have to say it now.

Good morning.

katherine. said...

all the things that go into making a house a home....

Mig said...

I need to move stuff around every few years. It makes me feel as though I've added space to my home. (Though usually the excuse for doing it is that we've bought some furniture or something that won't fit without re-arranging everything so probably I've just filled up some more space)
Thing that bothers me these days is eventually I just won't be able to move heavy furniture! I'll have to tell someone else where to put it and no one else can do it quite right!

It'll be a good thing when you can finally settle your presence and your warmth into the house.